Imagine that you have just returned from a date with a very nice man. He is charming, has a great sense of humour and acts like he really cares about you. You had a wonderful time chatting and laughing all evening, but you still have the feeling that something is wrong, that it’s all too good to be true.
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Maybe it’s because he flirted with the waitress who served you? Or met an acquaintance at the bar who spoke to him a little too frivolously? Is it jealousy – or is something really fishy here? Are you special – or does he behave this way with all other women?
Such questions may be valid and may indicate that you are dealing with a womaniser.
Who can be called a womaniser
A womaniser is a man who can win the favour of many women, but is not going to commit to any of them. Most often he is charismatic and flirts on a professional level.
Usually, a womaniser says or does something he doesn’t actually believe in, just to attract the attention or even win the heart of a woman. He enjoys the game itself rather than the outcome.
Where you can meet a womaniser
Men of this type feel great on websites and dating apps. Thanks to the growing popularity of services, it becomes much easier for womanisers to communicate and go on dates with more women. They can send the same pick-up phrases and get the approval and recognition they need. Sometimes it gets to the point where women create groups on social media to see if they are dating the same person.
At the same time, of course, a womaniser can be found anywhere – in a bar, at an exhibition, in the park. Such men are usually open to dating in any environment.
Why become womanisers
From the point of view of psychology, such behaviour can have different reasons. For example:
Problems with self-esteem. Numerous dates for womanisers – this is a way to increase self-esteem and feel their importance by getting confirmation from the outside.
Lack of success. Some men focus on career and wealth, but fail to achieve their goals. They feel they can’t do much for relationships and find little value in them, so they reject women before they get to know them better.
Objectification of women. Womanisers see them solely as an opportunity to fulfil their needs and use relationships only to enhance their status and ego.
However, there is no universal psychological explanation for any behaviour in principle, and the motives that drive womanisers are endless. Someone is trying to explore different facets of their personality, entering into a short-term relationship, and someone is frightened by the vulnerability associated with serious obligations to the partner, and thus they avoid it.
How to realise that you have fallen in love with a womaniser
A man who is genuinely interested in a relationship differs from a womaniser in that he behaves in a way that makes you feel safe and realise that you are valued. He will deliver on what he promised and will constantly stay in touch, rather than responding to messages occasionally or going into the shadows for long periods of time.
In addition, a man who is genuinely in love will seek real intimacy. He will ask you more personal questions and tell you more about himself, and have more thoughtful conversations that go beyond superficial flirting.
